getting passed yesterday
by Hope Marie333
Summary: renesmee and jacob are married and just lost their first child. renesemee feels like its her fault and is trying to cope with the lost of their son.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

I look around and all I see are blurred out faces of my family and friends telling me everything will be ok and they are sorry for my lost. I feel suffocated and at the same time so alone. How could this have happened to me? Why my child.

Slowly I walk out the front door of my parent's house and into the woods. I needed to get away from all the sorrow and sadness. I walked slowly threw the trees and found the spot where Jacob finely asked me to be his wife. That was the start of what I thought would be the perfect life.

I sat down by our tree and cried for the first time since we lost the baby. Just thinking for our son made me cry more. "You didn't even have a name yet…"

I heard something move behind me and jumped up to see my father standing with his arms held out to me. I ran into his arms and cried harder feeling like a child again. He held me close and rubbed my hair.

"Renesmee…" I could tell he was trying to hold back his tears.

"Why me daddy… everything was fine and then everything went wrong," I started to cry harder, "this is all my fault."

"Don't say that. This is not your fault. No one knew what would happen if you got pregnant or even if you could," he looked down at me, "maybe it wasn't the right time."

I pulled away from him. "How can you say that? I've been married almost 3 years. All we have wanted was a baby and I killed it. I KILLED MY CHILD DAD. DON'T YOU GET THAT! THAT'S I WILL EVER BE IS A KILLER!"

I turned and ran. Faster then I had ever ran before. I ran until I got to our house on the reservation. I opened the door and slammed and locked it. I looked around our house and screamed. I picked up the picture of my father and threw it and the glass shattered.

I stared to pick up anything I could find and threw it everywhere. I went from every room till I got to the nursery. I stood in the middle of the room and looked at everything we had done.

The light green paint that had taken us two days to paint because we couldn't stop painting each other to get it done. The crib that was Jacobs as a baby that he insisted he put together himself along with the changing table. The pictures of us and little sayings I had found that I thought would be prefect.

The rocking chair that was Jacobs mothers. All the stuffed animals and clothes we had bought. I walked over and picked up the white stuffed animal wolf my parent's had bought and sat down in the rocking chair.

I rocked back in forth for a while crying alone for a while. Thinking of all the things Jacob and I wanted to do with our son. Long walks on the beach, playing in the sand, and building sand castles.

Jacob wanted to teach him everything his father taught him about the tribe and where we came from. How to make things with your hands and climb trees.

We couldn't wait to be parents and now we won't be. "And it all my fault." I sat there for hours till I heard Jacob unlock the front door and walk inside. I heard him sigh. "Nessie?"

I got up and walked out to the living room still holding the stuffed wolf tight. I looked at him and tears filled my eyes. "I'm sorry…"

He looked at me and knew I wasn't talking about trashing the house. He walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me. He kissed my forehead. I could feel how he wanted to cry too but was trying to be the strong one for my sake.

I cried more. He picked me up in his arms and carried me to our room. We laid together. Me crying and him holding me till we finely fell asleep ending one of the worse days of our lives, hoping tomorrow would be a little easier then the last.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

I woke up to the smell of bacon, eggs and coffee. I rolled over to find the other side of the bed empty and cold. I got up and walked into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror.

"God I look like shit," I said out loud. I had make up all down my face and my eyes where beat red. I sighed and washed my face hoping it would help. It really didn't. I sighed again and brushed my hair and teeth till after I tried to eat.

I walked out of the room and into the hallway to find the nursery door pad locked. I stood there for a minute. Finely I turned and walked down the hallway and into the kitchen. Jacob was pouring the coffee as I walked in.

"Good morning Beautiful," he smiled at me and handed me the cup of coffee. I took it and sat down, then looked at him. "Jake, why is the nursery door pad locked?" He sighed and walked over to me. "I didn't think it was healthy of ether of us to go in and look at it right now. I mean look at what happened to you last night after you went in there."

Jake reached out for me and I pulled away. I looked at him, "Look I'm sorry about last night but I really don't think you needed to go and pad lock our son's room. You make me feel like you don't even care that he's gone."

I was crying at this point. I covered my face with my hands. "Ness… I'm-"

My head jumped up "Don't you dare say you're sorry. I don't need any more apologies. I get them enough for my family I really don't need on from you to."

I got up and walked away from him. I went outside on the back deck and sat on the stairs. Jacob followed me out side which made me more upset. He sat next to me. "Nessie, I know you're grieving right now. And I understand that you mad about the baby's room but you need to understand is not good for you to look at the room right now. I know you blame your self for our son's death but it's not your fault." He looked at me and saw I was trying not to cry.

"But you also need to know that im grieving too and I need you to stand by me just like I need to stand by you. You can't keep pushing us all way." He stared to cry. "I feel like im losing you too…"

I looked at him and felt so bad. _"Look what im doing to my husband. He never cries. I need to try and get through this for him and myself."_ I pulled him close to me. "I'm sorry for every thing love" I kissed his cheek. He looked up at me "I know sweetheart, I under stand why." We kissed each other and smiled.

Then we heard the smoke alarm go off and he jumped up "shit the food." He ran in the house and I followed him. Jake grabbed the pan of eggs and put it in the sink under the water.

I laughed "Never will learn how to cook without burning the food will you Jake?" I giggled again and he turned and looked at me with a smile. "Well at least the food is fully done, unlike your chicken. It's always still clucking at us when you cook."

"Oh really, Jacob black?" I started walking over to him, grabbing the thing of eggs.

"Oh yes, renesmee Cullen-black" picking up the hoes from the sink.

"You said you loved my cooking" I smiled getting a bit closer to him.

"I lied to make you feel better" he smiled. That was it. I threw an egg and hit him in the face and laughed. "Anything else to say about my cooking Mr. Black?"

He looked at me and smiled "No just this" and sprayed me with the water. I screamed and he laughed. I turned and looked at him "Oh, its on wolfy." He smiled "Bring it vamp."

I threw eggs while he sprayed water. We laughed more then we had in weeks. I threw the last egg and he laughed. "No more eggs, huh? I still have water."

That's when I went for the fridge, but he caught me. I screamed and laughed. He started to tickle me and I screamed and laughed harder. "Ok, ok I give. You win."

He put me down and I faced him smiling. "I will always win ness. When will you ever realize that?" I giggled "I let you win." He grinned down at me, brushing the hair out of my face. I smiled "I love you my Jacob." He blushed "I love you too nessie." He leaned down and kissed me deeply.

I smiled and wrapped my arms and around his neck and kissed him back. He wrapped his arms around my waist and lifted me up and set me on the counter and kissed me deeper. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him closer. I pulled back slightly and smiled "You got egg on my face."

He smiled and started to kiss down my neck. I moaned slightly and I felt him smile. He kept kissing my neck. I felt his hand start to go up my shirt and moaned again. Just as his hand reached my breast, there was and knock at the door. We both sighed.

I kissed him again, then jumped off the counter. I walked to the door and opened it. It was Quil, Claire and Embry (jakes friends / wolf pack)

"Good morning renesmee" Claire smiled. I smiled back "good morning Claire." "Quil, Embry," I nodded at them "come on in."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

I shut the door behind them as Jake walked up with a towel, wiping egg off his face. "Hey guys, what's up," he smiled at them. I walked up and took the towel from him and wiped my face and smiled at them.

"I think we should ask you that" Quil smiled. "Yeah why are you guys covered in eggs and water, or do we not want to know" Embry laughed.

Me and Jake smiled at each other and laughed. "It's a long story but you guys are just in time for breakfast. Are you hungry?" I smiled at them. Embry shook his head "We can't stay we just came to get Jake cause Sam needs to see us."

I sighed, a bit a little upset because I waned to spend the day with just him. Jake looked at me "I'll be back soon I promise." I smiled slightly "I know its ok I'll hang out with Claire until you get back."

We kissed good bye and Jake, Quil and Embry left leaving me and Claire. Claire smiled at me "You go take a shower and I will clean up." I smiled at her "thanks I'll be right out to help you."

I walked to the bathroom and hopped in the shower. I washed my hair with the shampoo my aunt Alice orders in from some where. I quickly wash my body and shave my legs. I get out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel and go to our bed room.

I look through my closet and pick out jakes favorite sundress on me and put it on. I put on my tan wedges and brush my hair. I look at my self in the mirror and smile happy about how I look. I walk out of our room to the kitchen to find Claire had finished cleaning and stared to cook breakfast.

"Oh Claire you didn't have to cook too," I walked up to her. She smiled at "Don't worry about it I like cooking." I smiled back "Well I set table out back and we will eat out side it nice today and I could use the fresh air."

I got plates, cups and silverware and set the table. Then help Claire bring the food and juice outside. We sat down and filled our plates and cups and started to eat.

We sat in silent for a while eating and watching the sky. Claire looked at me and made a noise. I looked up at her "Is something wrong Claire?" She looked at me "Can I ask you something?" I smiled "Of course you can. What's up?"

She looked down as she asked "I was just wondering… cause no one would tell me… what happened to the baby?" I stared at her for a minute unable to speak. I got up and walked to the stairs and stared out into the trees. "I'm sorry Renesmee I shouldn't have asked that," Claire said with ashamedness in her voice.

"No it's ok. I need to start talking about it 'because if I don't then I will never get through the pain." I sighed a bit "everything was going great the day before. My and Jake where so happy. We where trying to figure out what we should name him. I liked the name Noah but he wasn't sure about it. He liked the name Hayden."

I was trying to hold back the tears. "I started to feel contractions really bad at 31 weeks. I wasn't worried because grandpa Carlisle said that sometimes babies are ready before your due date."

I started to get choked up. "After he was out Carlisle could tell there was something wrong and took him…" I stared to cry "he had a heart defect and they tried to do surgery but he died on the table."

I was crying very hard now and Claire came over and wrapped her arm around my shoulder. "He never cried… I never even got to hold my son…"

She held me tightly while I cried hard. "Nessie, im so sorry" she told me. I was trying to breathe through all of the pain I was feeling at the moment. I kept replaying everything that happened that day.

"I think I need to sit down for a minute" I looked at Claire. She nodded and helped me into the house and sat me down on the couch.

Claire stayed with me all day listening to me talk about everything me and Jake had planed to do with the baby. How I felt about it being my fault. She helped me clean the house and make dinner for Jake and his pack.

When Jake came home he saw my face and how red my eyes were and knew what had happened.

He walked over to me and kissed my forehead "I'm sorry I left you here." I looked up at him "its ok I needed to talk to someone about everything." He smiled at me and kissed my lips.

I smiled at him then at Claire. Quil walked up and held Claire close and smiled. Everything was getting better but I still had a long way to go.

"So who's hungry? Me and Claire cooked all your favorites," I smiled at them all.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

I was finishing the dishes as Jacob shut the door behind Claire, Quil and Embry. Jacob came up behind me and hugged me from behind. He whispered in my ear "I really missed you today."

I smiled putting the last dish down and turned "I missed you too. Claire and I talked about a lot of tough things today."

He nodded "I could tell. Are you ok?" I looked at him "it was really hard for me to talk about him, but I think I will be ok." He smiled at me and kissed me "I love you"

I smiled and kissed him back "I love you too." He smiled and started to put away the leftover food. I poured myself a little wine, a new habit of mine since the baby died, and sat on the counter. "So what did Sam want today?" I took a sip.

"Nothing really, he just waned to see where my head is and talk about pack stuff." He smiled at me. "Oh… so where is your head?" I looked at him as I drank my wine.

He turned and looked at me "well I mean it's been hard but I've been getting through it ok. I mean I love our son and I always will but I mean when its time we will try again." I nodded a bit "and when do you think you will want to try again?"

Jake looked at me "when ever you and me feel that its right. When we get passed our sons death." I nodded again thinking to myself _"is it wrong that I kind of want to try now… yes it is. I don't want Jake to feel like I want to replace our son. That would and never could happen but I still want to be a mom. I'm ready to be a mom." _

Jake walked up and stood in front of me "what are you thinking about?" I shook my head "never mind it's stupid…" He looked at me "nothing you think is stupid. Please tell me."

I looked up at him and sighed. I put my hand on his face and showed him my thoughts and what me and Claire had talked about today. When I finished showing him I looked down ashamed of myself for thinking that. I couldn't look at him. I felt so terrible. My son just passed away and I already want another baby.

I got off the counter and pushed passed him. I ran to the bathroom and locked the door. I sat on the side of the tub and held my face in my hands. I cried hard. I heard Jake come down the hallway and try to open the door.

"Nessie…" he knocked on the door, "please open the door." He knocked again. "Love… please…I we need to talk."

I cried more as I got up and unlocked the door. I turned away so he couldn't see my face as I cried. Jake put his hand on my shoulder "love… look at me please."

I turned slowly and faced him. Jake took my face and in his hands and kissed me hard. The whole thing took my by surprise. I slowly began to kiss him back.

Jake pulled away a bit and smiled slightly "I understand love. I understand how you feel. I feel the same way about every thing." I looked up at him "Really?"

He nodded "Yes. I want to try and have another baby now, but it does feel wrong to think that right now." I looked down "I know I feel like the worse person in the world."

Jake lifted my chin up to look at him "but your not. Like you said we could never replace him. And that's not what we are trying to do. We are trying to get passed everything." I nodded slowly. He looked at me "But I do feel like trying to have a baby right now is wrong."

I turned and sat down "I know it is. But I can't help wanting to. "I sighed "what are we going to do Jake?"

He walked over and sat next to me "we won't try. We will live. If it happens now it happens but not because we are trying to have one. Ok?"

I looked at him "but it's still like we are trying." He sighed "I know…"

We sat there for a minute both thinking about it all. I turned and looked at him. I turned his head and kissed him deeply. Jake pulled back slightly "what was that?" I smiled "living like you said too."

He smiled at me and kissed me deeply. Slowly we picked up from where we left off this morning. Jake picked me up and brought me to the bed room and laid me down.

After that everything is a blur. I felt like I was on cloud nine. I felt like nothing had happened to us a few weeks ago even though I knew it had. But being with Jake was the one thing in my life that was right. Being in jakes arms that night after we made love was the best night I had ever had.

And I hoped it wouldn't be the last.


	5. Chapter 5

Hey readers, I just wanted to take a minute to say thank you for reading and following my story. Please send me message and reviews to let me know what you think.

Thanks again.

Hope Marie 3

Chapter 5:

The days, which followed that night, where magical. We spent everyday together. We walked the beach at La Push. We hunted together. Of course Jake felt weird about me taking down animals bigger then myself.

Every time I got a stag he would make a face. I laughed so hard that I forgot about hunting all together.

Then after every long day together we made love to each other. It felt so good to still be able to love each other in that way. We didn't ever want to leave the house. We just wanted to be together away from everything.

My parent's started to call the house a lot to see if we were still alive. They never came over knowing we needed our time together to grieve over our son.

I never said a word to them about the talk that Jake and I had about wanting to have another child. I knew they would never approve. They were so worried the last time.

They worried about what would happen to me. If my body could handle it since I'm not fully human and Jake's a werewolf. But mostly, not that they would say it to my face; they were worried about the Volturi.

The Volturi would most likely kill me and the baby. It wouldn't be the first time they tried to kill me. But I don't know what I would have done if they had found about the baby the last time and tried to kill him. Just the thought of it enraged me.

Weeks after Jake and I stayed to ourselves, my mom finely convinced us to come over and have "family time" as she called it. Jake and I were worried about my father reading our minds and finding out what we were up to and that would not be good.

On our way there Jake was freaking out.

"Edward is going to find out and is going to kill me," he was trying not to take his eyes off the road. I sighed and took one of his hands "No he's not. Just don't think about it." I tried to smiled at him "and besides were married and we can make out own choices."

Jake looked at me slightly the back at the road "that's not how he sees it. You know your father really doesn't like how we are together. He's been waiting for a reason to kill me."

I sighed "Jake please stop. I hate hearing you talk like that." I looked out the window as we pulled into the driveway.

"Jake turned off the car and looked at me "I'm sorry Nessie, I just don't want anything to happen tonight that might hurt you." I smiled nd kissed him "nothing will, I'll have my husband there to protect me as always."

Jake smiled at me and we kissed again. We got out of the car and walked up to the door and knocked.

My mom door and smiled "Renesmee, Jake!" she hugged as both tightly as we came inside. "We've missed you two around."

Jake made a face and I elbowed him in the gut. We both smiled. Unlike my father, she never made Jake feel unwelcome.

"Where's dad?" I asked a little worried of where he may be. She smiled "he went hunting with the others. They should be back soon. Everyone wants to see you."

I smiled slightly and followed her into the kitchen, which was only use when Jake and I came over. The smell in the kitchen was of chicken parmesan. "Mmm, it smells so good Bells." Jake sat down at the table.

Mom smiled at him as she checked the sauce. I got some thing to drink for me and Jake and sat next to him at the table. He put his arm around my waist and smiled.

Mom smiled at us "So…" She walked over and sat with us. "Why don't you tell me what's going on before your father gets home." We both just looked at her amazed that she knew something was up with us.

"Oh come on, I know you both. There something you don't want Edward to find out and tell me about. So just spit it out now" she smiled at us.

I looked at Jake and he nodded giving me the ok. I sighed and looked down "well… we talked about it and… we decided to have another baby." I slowly looked up at her, and to my surprise she didn't seem upset.

She took our hands and looked at us "I knew you would." I looked at her "so you're not mad?" She sighed "no. but I am worried. I just don't want you to have to go through that again."

I nodded and Jake looked at her "you're not going to tell Edward right?" She smiled at him "no I don't want him to kill you ether. So I'll help make sure he doesn't find out."

I smiled "thanks mom, for understanding." She kissed my cheek "of course sweetie."

Just then we heard the door open and shut. I stood up at my father and every one walked in to the kitchen smiling at me.

My father smiled and hugged me tightly "Hi sweetheart." I smiled as he let me go "Hi daddy." He smiled down at me "I've missed you so much."

I smiled "I've missed you too daddy" then looked behind him at my family "all of you."

Once my father moved over to my mother family started to fight over me. They all hugged, kissed and hugged me again. Everyone but my father said hi to Jacob, even Aunt Rosalie was pleasant to him.

We sat and talked. Well more like I talked and they listen, even when I wasn't saying anything they didn't already know. When dinner was done they left me and Jake to eat together and were in the living room talking among them selves.

After we were done we went in to the living room and sat next to each other. Aunt Alice and Aunt Rosalie were talking about a shopping trip they plan to take. Of course Uncle Emmett, Uncle Jasper and grandpa Carlisle where talking about some baseball game. Mom and Grandma Esme had gone to clean up the kitchen.

So the only one not talking was my dad. That made me nerviest. I looked over and saw him staring at me and Jake. He made a motion for use to follow him.

We looked at each other and got up and followed him out side to the woods. When we had gotten far enough from the house he turned and looked at us. "I know what's going on and im not happy about it" he said looking upset. That's when I knew that Jake was right, he was going to kill him and most likely me too.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

I looked and Jake and he looked at my father. Jake was tense and looked like he was ready to phase at anytime. I looked at my father scared for both me and Jake. I wished we had never come over today.

My father sighed "I know that…"

"_Oh god here it comes." I thought to myself. _

"I know that I'm the reason you haven't come over to see us" he looked at me and Jake "and I'm sorry." Jake looked at me stunned. That's how I felt too. I couldn't believe that he thought it was his fault.

"Dad…" I started and he cut me off. "Don't say it Renesmee. I know that what I said about the baby hurt you. Both of you" he looked over at Jake. He sighed and what up to both of us "I know I've never really made you feel welcome here Jacob, since you married my daughter."

He put his hand on Jakes shoulder "I'm sorry for that. And I just want you to know that I'm proud that my daughter married you. Someone who will protect her with their life. Who will love her forever." He smiled "so thank you Jacob."

And for the first time since Jake and I got married, my father hugged him. I stood there in shock. After he hugged Jake, he hugged me tightly. We went back to the house and had a wonderful night with my family.

It felt good to laugh and talk with my family after the last time I had seen them. I felt alive again. Jake and I went home and just smiled and held each other all night long.

I was no longer worried about my father killing Jake if I got pregnant. I couldn't wait to start again with Jake.

The next day Jake had to go to work. They were starting to get upset because he hadn't been there. So I cooked him breakfast and make him a lunch.

I missed not having him there all day but I knew we needed the money for bills. My family was always trying to help us out with money and things but Jake and I wanted to do it our selves.

So I spent the day cleaning the house. Every single room, well besides the nursery which was still pad locked. I swept, moped, dusted, vacuumed, and even moved the living room around.

After everything was done I went and hopped in the shower and got dressed. I did curled my hair and did my make-up and grabbed my purse and keys. I went to my car, which my father got me for my birthday, and got in.

I turn the car on and drove away from our house. I didn't even know where I was going, I just wanted to drive. I drove till I saw this little store. For some reason I needed to go inside.

I got out of the car and walked into the store. I looked around a saw cute clothes and shoes. I mean im not a big shopper and I don't really go often especially for clothes but everything I saw was really cute to me.

I looked around and picked out this really cute dress and sandals. I didn't want to spend too much so I decided that would be it. I walked up to the register and smiled at the woman behind it "good afternoon."

She smiled back "good afternoon, will this be it?" I nodded and she started to check me out. She smiled at me "so when are you due?" I looked at her surprised "excuse me?"

Her smiled dropped a bit "I mean when is the baby due?" I smiled slightly "oh I'm not pregnant." She smiled lightly "oh so are you buying these for a friend?"

I looked at her "No for myself. Why?" She looked at me "I'm sorry but this is a maternity clothing store. And well you look like your glowing so I just assumed."

I smiled and gave her some money "It's ok but what do you mean I'm glowing?" She smiled "well they say when a woman's pregnant they glow." I nodded "oh" I smiled at her "thanks and have a good day."

I ran to my car and threw the bag inside and hopped in. I started the car and sped home. I ran threw the door and into the bathroom. I grabbed the small box under the sink.

I waited 3 minutes before I looked at my sink. When I did I slowly fell to the floor holding the test. My heart started racing and I couldn't breath.

"I'm pregnant." I said out loud.

Hey readers,

Thank you for reading this chapter. Please send me a message or review to let me know what you think of Renesmee being pregnant. I would love your input so I can make this store better for all of you.

Thanks again,

Hope Marie 3


	7. Chapter 7

Hey readers,

I'm sorry it has taken me a few days to post another chapter. I've been having family stuff going on that I haven't been able to sit down and write. I hope you all like this chapter.

Oh and I wanted to ask you all to please send me a message with both boy names and girls names for Jacob and Renesmee's new baby I haven't decide if it will be a boy or a girl yet. But I wanted all of your inputs on the name. So please send me a personal message with the name or names you like and if you can a reason why you think that should be the name.

Thank you for reading.

Hope Marie 3

_

Chapter 7:

I sat on the floor, in the bathroom, until Jacob came home. I couldn't move. I was in a daze. The first I got pregnant, it took us 5 months to get pregnant. This time it took not even a month.

"Some thing doesn't feel the same…" I said quietly to myself. I heard Jake call out for me. Some how, that got me up. I slowly I walked down the hall to the living room where Jake was.

Jake looked at me "Nessie? What's wrong?" I looked at him and slowly handed him the test. He took it from me and looked at it. He took a deep breath and looked at me "really?"

I nodded slowly and he smiled. Jake picked me up and kissed me deeply "oh god I'm so happy Nessie." He kissed me again "I love you so much." He kept kissing me until he realized I wasn't kissing him back. He put me down and looked at me "what's wrong Nessie aren't you happy?"

I looked at him "I am happy, very happy. But some thing feels different, maybe even wrong…" I sat on the couch looking at the test in my hands. Jake sat next to me "love if this is about our son-"I looked at him "Noah. He name is Noah." He nodded "Noah. If you feel guilty about this don't this is what we wanted remember?"

I stood up "this has nothing to do about feeling guilty this has to do with the fact that I got pregnant this fast." He looked at me "nessie it happens."

"God Jake, you're not listening to me!" he stood up "yes I am. I just don't understand what you're trying to tell me." I ripped my shirt up to show my stomach, and the fact that there was a little bulged already there.

Jake's eyes were huge "Wh-what is that? That wasn't there this morning…" I sighed "that's what I've been trying to get you to understand. This is not like last time. I'm worried."

Jake picked up his keys "Lets go." He ran out the door with me close behind "where are we going?" he was already in the car "To see Carlisle, and find out what's going on with you."

We were at the house in less then five minutes. Jake flew up the stairs and into the house calling for grandpa Carlisle. When I got inside it looked the Jake had already expanded everything and everyone looked worried.

My mother came over and hugged me tightly "Renesmee…" I hugged her back "mom." She let go and looked at me "Are you ok?" I nodded as grandpa Carlisle came over "Renesmee lets go up to my office and check everything out." I nodded and followed him up stairs with my mom and Jake close behind.

We got up stairs and I saw everything was set up for an ultra sound. I laid down on the bed and pulled shirt up. Jake was holding one and hand and my mother holding the other.

Grandpa Carlisle put the gel on my stomach then started the ultra sound. I laid there and waited for him to tell me everything was ok and it was just in my head.

But he didn't, he didn't tell me everything was ok and it was just in my head. He sighed and looked at me "Nessie…" I could feel the tears coming to my eyes. "You're defiantly pregnant. But like your mother I can't see the baby threw the ultra sound."

Jake jumped in before I could say anything "Is the baby going to kill her doc?" "I can't be sure of anything if I can't look at the baby."

I looked at everyone and their faces. My mom looked worried, grandpa Carlisle was trying to figure out what he could do for me and Jake… Jake looked scared, for me and the baby.

Grandpa and Jake stayed up stairs talking while me and my mom went down stairs into the kitchen. When we walked in I saw my father. And he did not look happy to see me at all.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey readers,

So again for the slow update on this story I'm going through a lot right now. I will try and write faster so I can update more.

Oh and thanks for the baby names from any one I still haven't made my decision about a boy or a girl. So please send me more names.

Thanks for reading- Hope Marie

Chapter 8:

I stood face to face with my father and was scared. His eyes were cold and hard. I took a deep breath and opened my mouth to speak and he gave me a look that made me shut my mouth and listen.

"I can't believe this Renesmee…" he looked at me "I really can't. Why in the hell would you do this to your self, again? I thought you were smarter then that. I thought you understood the risk if this were to happen? The Volturi… The fact that you could die. You're putting our whole family in danger. But of course you didn't this of that did you?"

I snapped my head up "Yes I did this about that. Everything you just said I thought about and is still thinking about. Dad, why you cant you understand that this is my life and this is what I want. Im not going to live in fear and hide behind you like you want me too."

"Renesmee…" mom looked at me.

I ignored her and kept going "the only reason your upset is because you don't like the fact that in with Jake and I'm not your little girl. You can't protect me forever, dad. I'm not a baby anymore. I'm an adult."

He walked towards me "No your not. If you were an adult you wouldn't act like a child and do stupid things like a child. You are a child, Renesmee. MY CHILD! AND I REFUSE TO SEE YOU DIE FOR THAT THING INSIDE YOU!"

I lost it "DON'T WORRY DAD YOU WONT CAUSE I'M NO LONGER YOUR DAUGHTER. I'M DONE TRYING TO PLEASE YOU! I'M DONE TRYING TO BE SOMETHING I'M NOT FOR YOU! STAY OUT OF MY LIFE BECAUSE I WILL STAY OUT OF YOURS!"

I ran out of the kitchen hearing my mom call for me. I ran out side and to the car and got inside. I turned the car on and drove away from the house not looking back.

I cried the whole way home and all the way into my room where I started to pack my things. I couldn't believe what my father said to me and about my baby. "OH MY GOD I HATE HIM!"

I threw mine and Jake's clothes in to suitcases. I heard the phone ring and ignored it. I knew it was my mom calling me to come back. I was done with him and done with everything.

I phone kept ringing and ringing. I finally answered it "What mom?"

She sounded scared and im a hurry "Renesmee you have to get out of that house!" I sat down "Wait mom what are you talking about?"

"The Volturi….nessie I don't know when or how they find out but Alice seen them come hear for you, to kill you and the baby. You need to get out of hear now. Jake and I our on our way now. Hurry!"

I hung up the phone and threw everything I got my hands on into our bags. I went to our safe that we had for emergences and took all the money, the passports and drivers license we had ready just incase this happened.

I ran outside just as Jake and my mother pulled up. I threw everything in the trunk and hoped in. "Mom what are we going to do. Where are we going to go?"

She looked at me "you have the next flight out of hear and to Rio. You will take a boat to esme's island. You will stay there until I call. And Nessie please stay calm."

I took deep breaths and tried to stay calm but it wasn't as easy as it seemed. We got to the air port and Jake parked the car and got the bags. My mom walked me into the airport and be for I knew it I was saying good bye to her and was on my way to Rio.

Jake held me close threw the whole flight. I cried and slept most of the way to Rio. When we got there we got our bags and took a cab to the docks where our boat was waiting for us.

We got in and started for my grandma's island. Jake and I didn't saw a word to each other the whole way there. I couldn't find anything to say. I was scared and ashamed that I was doing this again to my family. I put them in danger and I couldn't do anything about it.

We got to isle Esme and docked the boat. It was the first time I had ever been here. We went up to the house and put our suit cases down.

"Wow… this is so beautiful." I said out loud. "Yeah it is" Jake nodded. He looked at me "I'm going to put these in our room why don't you lay down and rest a bit and I will cook dinner. You haven't eating since we left."

I nodded and went to the white room which was my mother's favorite. I tried to lay down and sleep but couldn't. I was so worried about my family. I went into the bathroom and washed up and put on some different clothes. I started for the kitchen but stopped in front of a full length mirror.

My stomach had gotten bigger on the way here. I stood there looking at it from every angle. "Wow…" I heard Jake say behind me.

I turned around "I know. Its crazy how fast this whole thing is going." I held and looked at my belly. Jake walked up to me "everything is going to be ok nessie. I won't let them hurt you or the baby I promise."

I started to cry as I looked at him "I know but what about my family… my mom and dad. You know I didn't mean what I said to him." Jake pulled me close "shhh love. Calm down baby. They are all gong to be fine."

"I hope so…" I looked up at him "but what I want to know is how they find out."

Jake nodded "so do I but lets not think about that right now." He kissed my forehead "right now we need to feed you and our baby." I smiled and kissed him "I love hearing you say our baby." Hr smiled "so do I love."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

_I saw them. The Volturi. They where coming for me and my family. Their red eyes seemed to piece through my body. I saw Jake running towards them ready to kill. I saw my mom and dad on his flakes. I screamed for everyone to stop, but no one listened. _

_I saw Aro, Cairus and Marcus standing there with what looked like smiles on their faces. Felix and demetri jumped at jake ready to kill. My mother and father pulled them off and tried to kill them but they weren't strong enough. _

_They laid there not moving. They where dead. I screamed and tried to run to them but felt some thing pull me back. I looked down and saw a little boy with Jakes hair and face but my eyes. He was a little lighter then Jake. _

_He was beautiful. He held on to me. I looked and saw Felix get his arms around jakes body and crush his bones. He was dead. _

"_JAKE!" I screamed for him. _

I jumped up "No!" I looked around and knew it was just a dream. My hand went to my stomach feeling it was still hard and round. Jakes arms were around me "Its ok nessie. I'm here. It was just a dream."

I took deep breaths and looked at him "you died this time." I felt the tears fall down my face. He held me tighter "I'm right here nessie. I'm ok and so are you and the baby."

I nodded and tried to stop crying. When I did I got out of bed and looked at him "I need some air." I walked out side and stood on the porch and took a deep breath.

We had been on Isle Esme for almost two weeks and my mother still hadn't called. I was so worried about them. That's what Jake thinks is making me have the same nightmare every night.

My stomach had been growing everyday. Jake was starting to get worried. We didn't have my grandpa here to make sure everything was ok with me and the baby.

So far the only thing that I felt was wrong with this pregnancy was the fact that I was getting big very fast. Other then that everything seemed fine. I was eating the same; the baby wasn't breaking my bones or anything like that.

But of course Jake was still worried. He was worried that I was going to have this baby on the run and not at home where I should be. I'm worried to but I more worried about the fact that my family was in danger.

Jake walked out side and stood next to me and wrapped her arms around me the best he could. "Are you ok love?" he smiled at me. I nodded slowly "mo still hasn't called?" he shook he head no and I nodded again.

My stomach started to growl and I giggled "I this he's hungry" Jake smiled "are you sure he's a he and not a she?" He rubbed my belly and smiled at me "I'd like to have a little girl that looks like you"

I blushed "in the nightmares it a boy that looks just like you but lighter." Jake smiled "I don't care if it's a boy or girl just as long as they are healthy and so are you." I smiled and we walked inside together.

I sat at the table in the kitchen as Jake made me, eggs, bacon, and toast. He set a plate in front of me along with coffee, orange juice, and jam for my toast. I smiled at him and started to chow down. Maybe I wasn't eating the same? Jake had told me last night that we needed to get more food because I had been eating nonstop.

I smiled at Jake when I was done "that was really good baby thank you." I stood up and kissed him lightly and went over to the sink to do the dishes. Jake got up and dried them while I washed. We were done in like 10 minutes.

We spent they day house we spent everyday since we had been here. We sat around and waited for my mom to call us and let us know what was going on. I was really worried and so was Jake.

We were sitting playing cards when the phone finely rang. Jake jumped up and answered the phone "Bella?"

I looked at him and nodded that it was her. "Yeah everything is fine here other than the fact nessie is eating a lot and getting bigger everyday." He listen to my mom while I waited to know what was going on. He nodded again "ok first thing in the morning… we will be ready…thanks bells…she's right here hold on."

Jake handed me the phone and I took it quickly "mom!"

"Hi sweetheart. How are you doing?"

"I'm fine. Really pregnant. I swear mom I feel like all of this happened overnight. But anyways how are you and dad and the family?"

"We are all fine hunny. Just worried about you and Jake and the baby. We've been watching the Volturi but nothing has happened yet other then…"

"Other then what mom?"

I heard her take a deep breath "I have to go nessie I love you so much stay strong and give Jake a hug for me. Bye." _Click_

I stood there staring at the phone. There was something that my mom was hiding from me. Jake came up and took the phone and hugged me tightly "see they are fine love"

I looked at him "you know something that I don't and I want you to tell me what."


End file.
